Thursday, June 28, 2007

NBA Draft Blogness

6:50 Oh boy, let's see how long I stick with this. I'm as excited about this draft as I have been about any other sporting event the last six months or so. This is looking to be the best NBA Draft in years, in terms of talent. As far as technicolor suits go, that remains to be seen.

In fevered anticipation of Jay Bilas calling sixty young men "long" without a hint of irony for five hours, I'm doing my best to saturate myself with useless basketball prognostication. ESPNews has so many tickers going at the same time I keep expecting Optimus Prime to pop out of my TV screen. Decided to stick with the highly-underrated Washington Post Live (not that I might be biased or anything). The host (I just blanked on his name) is actually really good, and there's usually at least one good media guest on to talk about stuff around the DC Sports scene, which makes it a lot more entertaining and infromative than Sportscenter.

They get such a wide variety of people who are comfortable on camera, it's an entertaining running subplot of the show each day to see who the most awkward person on is. (It was a tie between Michael Lee and Camille Powell today, probably because they were on satellite feed via the NBA draft, though Michael Lee doesn't typically have a dominating screen presence.)

7:00 After hearing some BREAKING NEWS on ESPNews about Ray Allen going to Boston (possibly)...shocking really. I only read about it on Hoops Hype last night.
Just switched over to ESPN for a crappy intro delivered by Mike Tirico. First major fashon statement to report on: Joakim Noah, who I STILL think looks more like he belongs talking to Chris Hansen on "To Catch a Predator" than in the NBA, has some kind of weird Kenny G going on.

7:07 One thing about the whole Milwaukee maybe/kind of/possibly picking "E" Yianlian and "we're capitalists but not really" China getting pissed about him gong there, Milwaukee's owner is a U.S. Senator, meaning it could translate into an international political-economic situation. The NBA, "I LOVE this Geo-Political Organization".

7:10 SHOCKER----Jay Bilas thinks Greg Oden will be good. Way to go out on a limb Jay.

7:13 Prediction: Jeff Green will be better than Corey Brewer or Julian Wright (I think both will probably be good as well, with Brewer being a sure thing and Wright a bt more of a gamble than people think). Again, not like I'm biased or anything, but I have watched more of Jeff Green than most people. He's that good, as long as he's not afraid to take a shot or take over a game.

7:21 Does anybody else want to punch Noah in the face whenever they see him, or is that just me?

Yeah, that's what I thought. I didn't realize it the first time he was on camera and not until after Lisa Salters pointed it out, Noah's dressed exactly like someone in my fraternity would be at a big event. I'm confused as to why the world's ugliest woman would want to be dressed in a seersucker suit with a pink bowtie. That's a bold statement there.

7:25 Hey they're doing the same thing they do for the NFL Draft, where they plant a correspondent outside each team's front office, and have them make up stuff. Cool, glad to see ESPN's going all out for this draft.

7:30 I'm so rooting for "E" (note: if they're going to pronounce his name like this, this is how he's getting referred to in 'print from now on) to launch into the Communist manifesto when/if he gets interviewed. I think it'd go something like this:

Stu: So, E, how do you feel about going to a one of the whitest states and cities in the country, and how does it feel to finally realize your dream of playng in the NBA?

E, through translator: I look forward to bringing a Great Leap Forward to the barley fields and cheese factories of Wisconsin. I hope to *slam dunk* on the corrupt bourgeoise of the Atlantic and Central Divisions.

8:00 I just realized a good sports equivalent for Jeff Green; he's the Jaime Moreno of basketball: he's atheltic, a good scorer, great passer, does the little things right, but somehow plays most of the game at about 60% speed. It's like he plays in slo-mo, but somehow sees everything before it happens. Also, I just realized Noah really looks like a tall, skinny Hurley from Lost with his hair like that.

8:04 I have as much confidence in E becoming a good NBA player as I have in the yuan becoming the most valued currency in the world.

Yes! He's getting interviewed! Favorite thing about America? Government doesn't force him to sell his house for $70, and no required labor in the rice fields*.

*Not what he said, but might be true.

8:11 If Del Harris told his son to take E and to mess up the Bucks, that'd have to be the most cold-hearted familial back stab since Fredo messed up the hit on Michael. Vitale thinks Boston got outsmarted on the Ray Allen trade. No argument here.

8:16 I think I'm only sticking around through the Wizards pick. The Arenas-Durant commercial for EA Sports is pretty cool, but not as good as Sean Taylor shouting, "the customer is Always RIGHT!" with some guy in a headlock for Easterns Motoers.

8:18 Dream trade: Jamison to Charlotte for the #8 and Gerald Wallace. Can't happen, but it'd be awesome.

8:21 Michael Jordan's fantasy basketball team picks Brandon Wright, who is actually better than a lot of people give credit, but he doesn't really fit the team. I wouldn't be surprised if they ended up trading him, especially after saying that Jordan wouldn't want to tale him on in a game of one on one.

8:24 Amazing, this draft is actually going the exact way a lot of experts picked so far. I'll bet the Bulls take Noah, just becuase they defensive/rebounding/hustle guys like that. They're not smart enough to take a post scorer or trade this pick.

8:26 Hey, I actually got that right! I aleady disliked the Bulls; now I'm going to be rooting against them every single game. His sister (I'm pretty sure that's his sister) is REALLY hot though.

8:28 I would love for the WIz to get Julian Wright, Al Thornton, Derrick Byars (maybe Nick Young), Thaddeus Young (who's not an immediate impact guy, but could be great in a couple years) and maybe Spencer Hawes, who could be a Brad Miller type guy (not Miller now...when he was good five years ago). I just realized these are the next six best guys available. Niiiiiiiice.

8:32 This is the most predictable draft ever: the team with Brad Miller just took the next Brad Miller.

8:34 ATL takes Law...I gurantee.

8:35 Minor Thread and I are co-ordinating on the Wizards pick...

8:50 We've determined that anyone but Jason Smith would be a perfect fit for the Wiz.

8:58 Clippers taking Sean Williams would be beautiful

9:07 Wooooooooooo!!!!! Wizards are picking. Who wants to play for the most fun team in the East?

9:14 Nick Young, baby! I like it. Looks like a great scorer, good outside shooter. Certainly athletic enough to play good defense too. Looks like he could step in and be the sixth man immediately if DeShawn Stevenson comes back, maybe start, as long as Eddie Jordan doesn't think he needs two unnecessary years to mature and be buried on a weak bench. Seems like a better version of whatever the Wizards thought they were getting from Jarvis Hayes. See ya, COnstable!

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